Focus...focus...focus...oh look it's me

A good friend of mine said my first blog was "Very all over the place."  That made me chuckle because that was inadvertently where I was going.  That quote - in a nutshell - describes me.  I am ALL OVER THE PLACE!  I went to college to become a veterinarian and walked out an English teacher.  People have asked me 'How does that happen?"  In answer to that...I have no answer to that.  It's just how I work.  Or how I have worked.  (I'm currently in the 3 step process of narrowing down my interests and focusing my forward motion on life.  I'm not sure what the 3 steps are as I'm looking into it still but aren't all cures of insanity 3 steps?  I'm hoping so cuz counting to 4 might be a bit of a challenge.)

And I gotta thank this friend because she inspired some focus into my second post.  I was debating with myself on what I should write next, whether it be some little tidbit of a story I'd gone through in past times or something more recently experienced.  When I read her comment I thought...yeah, I'll just go with that.  I'm all over the place.  I sometimes call myself a walking talking oxymoron - for those of you that know me DO NOT miss the 'oxy' in front of the 'moron'.

For the past five years I taught English and Vocational Agriculture.  During my 2nd year of teaching English and Vo-Ag I was told there were only 2 such teachers in the nation.  The stats were helped by my being a woman and teaching at opposite ends of the spectrum.  I can't verify the numbers but I can well believe it.  Most educators are more focused. I've also taught JAG (Jobs for America's Graduates).  I've taught Computer Skills, and P.E.  In Ag I've taught welding, Animal Science, and Intro to Ag.  I've coached volleyball, basketball, and track.  I've helped sponsor Battle of the Books.  I've played on town team softball and volleyball.  I'm FFA adviser.  I'm a volunteer leader in 4H and have recently become certified to instruct pistol in the shooting sports part of 4H. I barrel race but thoroughly enjoy anything that has to do with the equine industry.  I shoe my own horses and even made a little money in keeping others' horses shod.  I know I've forgotten a few things here but that's all right...they'll be caught up with as I write.

My lack of tunnel vision goes way back before college, way back before school started at all for me.  As a child I wanted to do everything, taste everything, see everything.  I used to terrify my mother by wandering off and making friends with perfect strangers.  Fortune and Faith favor the fools, though, and all the strangers I attached myself too were honest strangers and I always found my way back home.

Then school started - the first grade for me as Kindergarten just didn't happen - and I was one backward kid.  I didn't color the way the teacher's thought I should color and I didn't talk the way the other kids thought I should talk.  I longed for summer vacation but I liked the learning - most of the time.  I survived elementary.  My favorite subject was...well, I don't think I had a favorite subject.  I fit in better with the guys than the girls but I could get a long with just about everyone...yep, I was still bringing strangers home and asking if I could keep them.  My best friends were a sorrel gelding named Sonny, a mare named Flicka, a German Shepherd named HeyDog, and a bumble bee devouring Border Collie named Buddy.

Then came Purgatory...er...I mean Junior High.  I got my height then and I was as nearly as coordinated as a one legged Albatross.  It was rough, I won't sugar coat that one, but I developed some character through it all.  I learned to laugh at myself...you know it had to be pretty comical just watching me try to walk without taking out anything within arm's length of my body.  It was a whole new meaning to being 'all over the place' but I survived it.  The whole time my focus was on...everything.  HeyDog was still with us and my new best friend was a Palomino named Skeeter - though with him it was a love/hate relationship and he'll be subject of A LOT of stories.  I liked basketball and summer sunshine, dresses and shorts, tennis and sandals, straight wild hair and made the attempt at make up and nail polish.  I was not shy, at least I didn't think I was.  I was different, that was evident, and I still didn't quite fit in with any given group but I wasn't a complete outsider either.

High school came and I walked through every door I possibly could.  I played volleyball, basketball, and competed in track.  I took art, drafting, band (played flute and bari sax), orchestra (played the violin), drama, and anything that would legally get me out of a day of school.  My favorite subject was Science but I was pretty darn good in English and by now had found a passion in reading...though not ALL books were read in their entirety.  Sorry, Chuck (Charles Dickens), I still can't read any of your books all the way through.  I spent hours riding horses, worked at a riding stable for a summer job and helped out on the farm any chance I got.  I learned how to castrate, brand, ear mark, and rope.  I learned how to cook and sew.  I'm still trying...no...no really...to learn the art of cleaning.

College came and my parents thought I'd be focused...HA!!! but I was focused for the first two and a half years of college.  As focused as any freshmen, sophomore, and junior college kid can be.  Vet school here I come...not quite...and long story short I walked out with a major in English and a double minor in Animal Science and Education, a semester shy of having a double major - the Animal Science.  I would have had a BA and a BS...but let's face it there's some that will say the BS has been there all along.

I've rarely slowed down, but I still get a good whiff of the roses and the night sky will always capture my focus for a good few minutes.  And...I am in the process of narrowing my focus a little.  Eventually, I do have to decide what I want to be when I grow up.

So focus is a challenge for me, pinning me down to one specific just isn't going to be easy.  I am what I am!!! What am I?  Let's go back to the "I am what I am!"